anonfeedme ([personal profile] anonfeedme) wrote2012-07-02 05:55 pm

ANONYMOUS FEEDBACK MEME

ANONYMOUS FEEDBACK MEME
inspired by previous fic feedback memes.


1. Writers, leave a comment with your username/your writing journal/comm (and it would be helpful to write your username in the subject line as well). ETA: Please log in! There's been concern that some people might have had their names posted by other people, so from now on (July 6 3PM EST), usernames/fic communities left by an anonymous poster will be deleted. Thank you! (Tip! You can easily log in with your livejournal account with open id (usernamegoeshere.livejournal.com) if you don't have a dreamwidth one. )
Username tags on DW: <user name="usernamegoeshere">
Username tags on LJ: <user name="usernamegoeshere" site="livejournal.com">

2. Everyone, reply to the individual writers' threads with comments on their writing, positive or with suggestions or everything in between. No drama, no excess bashing, especially not on personalities, etc. Writers, please be prepared to take concrit!

3. Pimp out this post with the code below! Link your thread!

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 12:52 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 06:26 am (UTC)(link)
Your writing is kind of cute! Or it was from the baekyeol I read. I like how you described the scene too...easily imaginable.

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 01:19 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 06:34 am (UTC)(link)
I would strongly suggest linking directly to your fics next time.

Read here! (http://tentanda.livejournal.com/373.html#cutid1)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 01:43 am (UTC)(link)

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 03:40 pm (UTC)(link)
perfect amazing flawless please write more especially more girl groups

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[identity profile] phonebook.livejournal.com - 2012-07-09 05:25 (UTC) - Expand

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 05:26 pm (UTC)(link)
i don't actually know how to explain this, but your fic sounds like it's been translated into english (albeit very well, but still). maybe it's because you tend to be repetitive your sentence structure? it makes for a good storytelling atmosphere, but there's also a lot more telling than showing and the fics sound very 'cute' when i don't know if that's the sound you're going for (also, the pouting, rolling eyes, glaring, etc. all kind of cutesy). i wish you would use more 'says', because overuse of other dialogue tags is sometimes jarring.

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[personal profile] eludes - 2012-07-03 17:55 (UTC) - Expand

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-06 04:29 pm (UTC)(link)
i really admire that you can write for groups that no one else can and execute your ideas so well with words. your writing sometimes can act as meta for me when i read them because your characteristics are well done, although your sentence structure can be awkward sometimes, it's not really bad, either. i'm just glad fandom has you

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[personal profile] firequakes - 2012-07-06 23:44 (UTC) - Expand

Awesome

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 02:07 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 04:07 am (UTC)(link)
i really admire your ability to pack a lot into short sentences or short works as a whole.

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 02:20 am (UTC)(link)

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 05:06 am (UTC)(link)
natsudive: (IU)

[personal profile] natsudive 2012-07-03 05:45 am (UTC)(link)
i don't....know why i went anon for this.

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 05:43 am (UTC)(link)
I really just kind of love the way you can twist stories into something unique even though the plotline might start out as the most cliche thing.

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[personal profile] minwhore - 2012-07-03 18:27 (UTC) - Expand

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 05:32 am (UTC)(link)
Your writing is so beautiful and you always pull me into whichever universe you've created every time to the point that I'm emotionally invested <3

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 05:58 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 05:07 pm (UTC)(link)
i think the way you write is kind of basic-sounding, like "he did this. he did that. then, he walked there." it makes your fic read monotonously, or like it doesn't flow that well. the choppiness makes it difficult to get emotionally invested in the fic; in addition to that, i end up having a hard time imagining the narrating character actually thinking like that- i can't connect with your characters. some punctuation mistakes here and there that make your fic appear as though you rushed through it. (maybe a beta would help with this?)

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 07:12 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 07:15 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-09 01:28 pm (UTC)(link)
hi there! i read some of your fic occasionally, and here are some of my thoughts. it's been quite some time since you last wrote, so i'll base my thoughts on your most recent fic. what i liked was that the fic achieved the ultimate plot goal of a bonding road trip. however, i found that some of the dialogue in between was a bit... awkward? i think it might just be me. around the halfway mark it got a bit boring, but nevertheless, it was rounded up well with a satisfactory ending.

never stop writing!

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(Anonymous) - 2012-07-12 13:34 (UTC) - Expand
ueboaffection: (KAT-TUN)

[personal profile] ueboaffection 2012-07-03 07:21 am (UTC)(link)
[livejournal.com profile] ueboaffection Any feedback will be greatly appreciated :)
Edited 2012-07-03 07:23 (UTC)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-08 03:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Hi, I love your writing! Just a few thoughts:
This might just be me, but I find your writing is a bit too.. spaced out? With some of the more recent fics, it reads a bit like a MSN convo with so many breaks. For example, I found A Ya Vse Letala (and a lot of your older stuff, like beast and sj) easier to read because of the formatting as well as the fact that there's less dialogue.

Another thing is that it takes a while to understand what's actually happening, like with Days Upon the Ocean. I'm aware that that could be your intention, but readers like me (who blaze through fics quickly and don't bother slowing down if I don't understand some parts) will get horribly confused and won't enjoy it as much. I'll still be reading what you write though, I'm sorry I don't ever comment but I just feel too awkward lol
(btw, one of your fics is actually one of my favorites of all time in kpop!)

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[personal profile] staypainted - 2012-07-09 06:30 (UTC) - Expand
jarithka: ({KameDa} White Smiling)

[personal profile] jarithka 2012-07-03 07:54 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 08:10 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-06 06:07 am (UTC)(link)
I haven't really read much of your stuff (actually I only read it because I wanted to comment since you had none) but I did read your afterlife fic and your avatar au fic.

Sometimes (very rarely) you have a random grammar mistake or awkward wording. I think a beta would help but its nothing major.

The only thing that really jumped out at me was that your fics can seem disjointed. The flow is kind of awkward and I keep noticing random jumps in topic or suddenly you're at point Z and I have no idea how or why you got there. Somethings happen too suddenly when the rest of the fic seems to be going at a slower pace. I would advise rereading your fic and focusing on a constant pace.

Otherwise your plot ideas are pretty interesting. I actually wasn't going to read anything since I don't really care about your pairings but the afterlife premise was interesting enough to keep me reading, even though it ended up that not much happened.
Also as a side note the way you list pairings for your fic is a little misleading? I would probably list them more as gen with a little of the pairing, but this is mostly preference so....

Anyways I hope you keep writing!

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 08:27 am (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 02:39 pm (UTC)(link)
i've only read one or two of your b1a4 fics, but i do like your aus and the way you integrate the characters into the world. you write very nicely :)

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-04 08:13 am (UTC)(link)
I absolutely adore your fics, like adore them.

I love how much you love Donghae, and I really like the way you write him. In your fics, he isn't stupid or ridiculously sexy. He's just a regular guy, gullible and sweet. It's really great.

Your story Space: it's a big, big thing is one of my faves. So thanks for writing it! ^_^

♥from a hopeless fangirl

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 10:25 am (UTC)(link)

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 09:58 pm (UTC)(link)
your writing sounds very earnest and flows well. other than your porn, your fics aren't particularly memorable (and most don't really go anywhere) - which is a shame because i love your creativity in porn, but i love how your more serious fics read. so i wish you would take a step outside your comfort zone of canon and slice-of-life AUs and try writing maybe a well-developed sci-fi, steampunk, dystopia, etc. AU.

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(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 06:22 pm (UTC)(link)

(Anonymous) 2012-07-03 11:58 pm (UTC)(link)
your gtop angst fics are among the few to have made me cry because they're so sad. not sure if that's good or bad news to you, but I haven't read of fic of yours that I've hated so you're doing something right!

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